Karena kau tulang rusukku...

Sebuah senja yang sempurna, sepotong donat, Dan lagu cinta yang lembut.
Adakah yang lebih indah dari itu, bagi sepasang manusia yang memadu
Kasih?
Raka Dan Dara duduk di punggung senja itu, berpotong percakapan lewat,
Beratus tawa timpas, lalu Dara pun memulai meminta kepastian. Ya,
Tentang cinta.

Dara : Siapa yang paling kamu cintai di dunia ini?
Raka : Kamu dong?
Dara : Menurut kamu, aku ini siapa?
Raka : (Berpikir sejenak, lalu menatap Dara dengan pasti) Kamu tulang
Rusukku! Ada tertulis, Tuhan melihat bahwa Adam kesepian. Saat Adam
Tidur, Tuhan mengambil rusuk dari Adam Dan menciptakan Hawa. Semua pria
Mencari tulang rusuknya yang hilang Dan saat menemukan wanita untuknya,
Tidak lagi merasakan sakit di hati."

Setelah menikah, Dara Dan Raka mengalami masa yang indah Dan manis untuk
Sesaat. Setelah itu, pasangan muda ini mulai tenggelam dalam kesibukan
Masing-masing Dan kepenatan hidup yang kain mendera. Hidup mereka
Menjadi membosankan. Kenyataan hidup yang kejam membuat mereka mulai
Menyisihkan impian Dan cinta satu sama lain.

Mereka mulai bertengkar Dan pertengkaran itu mulai menjadi semakin
Panas.
Pada suatu Hari, pada akhir sebuah pertengkaran, Dara lari keluar rumah.
Saat tiba di seberang jalan, dia berteriak, "Kamu nggak cinta lagi sama
Aku!"

Raka sangat membenci ketidakdewasaan Dara Dan secara spontan balik
Berteriak, "Aku menyesal Kita menikah! Kamu ternyata bukan tulang
Rusukku!"

Tiba-tiba Dara menjadi terdiam , berdiri terpaku untuk beberapa saat.
Matanya basah. Ia menatap Raka, seakan tak percaya pada apa yang telah
Dia dengar.

Raka menyesal akan apa yang sudah dia ucapkan. Tetapi seperti air yang
Telah tertumpah, ucapan itu tidak mungkin untuk diambil kembali.

Dengan berlinang air Mata, Dara kembali ke rumah Dan mengambil
Barang-barangnya, bertekad untuk berpisah. "Kalau aku bukan tulang
Rusukmu, biarkan aku pergi. Biarkan Kita berpisah Dan mencari pasangan
Sejati masing-masing."

Lima tahun berlalu.
Raka tidak menikah lagi, tetapi berusaha mencari tahu akan kehidupan
Dara.
Dara pernah ke luar negeri, menikah dengan orang asing, bercerai, Dan
Kini kembali ke kota semula. Dan Raka yang tahu semua informasi tentang
Dara, merasa kecewa, karena dia tak pernah diberi kesempatan untuk
Kembali, Dara tak menunggunya.

Dan di tengah malam yang sunyi, saat Raka meminum kopinya, IA merasakan
Ada yang sakit di dadanya. Tapi dia tidak sanggup mengakui bahwa dia
Merindukan Dara.

Suatu Hari, mereka akhirnya kembali bertemu. Di airport, di tempat
Ketika banyak terjadi pertemuan Dan perpisahan, mereka dipisahkan hanya
Oleh sebuah dinding pembatas, Mata mereka tak saling mau lepas.

Raka : Apa kabar?
Dara : Baik... Ngg.., apakah kamu sudah menemukan rusukmu yang hilang?
Raka : Belum.
Dara : Aku terbang ke New York dengan penerbangan berikut.
Raka : Aku akan kembali 2 minggu lagi. Telpon aku kalau kamu sempat.
Kamu
Tahu nomor telepon Kita, belum Ada yang berubah. Tidak akan Ada yang
Berubah.

Dara tersenyum manis, lalu berlalu.
"Good bye...."
Seminggu kemudian, Raka mendengar bahwa Dara mengalami kecelakaan, mati.
Malam itu, sekali lagi, Raka mereguk kopinya Dan kembali merasakan sakit
Di dadanya. Akhirnya dia sadar bahwa sakit itu adalah karena Dara,
Tulang rusuknya sendiri, yang telah dengan bodohnya dia patahkan.

"Kita melampiaskan 99% kemarahan justru kepada orang yang paling Kita
Cintai. Dan akibatnya seringkali adalah fatal"

TREAT EVERY LOVE AS LAST LOVE

Sejak semula, keluarga dari si gadis tidak menyetujui hubungannya dengan sang pemuda. Mereka mengajukan alasa n mengenai latar belakang keluarga, bahwa jika si gadis memaksa terus bersama dengan sang pemuda, dia akan menderita seumur hidupnya..... Karena tekanan dari keluarganya, si gadis jadi sering bertengkar dengan pacarnya. Gadis itu benar2 mencintainya, dan dia terus-menerus bertanya, "Seberapa besar kamu mencintaiku?" Sang pemuda tdk begitu pandai berbicara, dia selalu membuat si gadis marah. Dan komentar-komentar dari orangtuanya membuatnya bertambah kesal. Sang pemuda selalu menjadi sasaran pelampiasan kemarahannya. Dan sang pemuda selalu membiarkannya melampiaskan kemarahannya kepadanya....

Setelah beberapa saat, sang pemuda lulus dari perguruan tinggi. Ia bermaksud meneruskan kuliahnya ke luar negeri, tapi sebelum dia pergi, dia melamar gadisnya, "Saya tidak tahu bagaimana mengucapkan kata2 manis, tapi saya tahu bahwa saya mencintaimu. Jika kamu setuju, saya ingin menjagamu seumur hidupmu. Mengenai keluargamu, saya akan berusaha keras untuk meyakinkan mereka agar meny etujui hubungan kita. Maukah kamu menikah denganku?" Si gadis setuju, dan keluarganya setelah melihat usaha dari sang pemuda, akhirnya merestui hubungan mereka. Sebelum pemuda itu berangkat, mereka bertungan terlebih dahulu. Si gadis tetap tinggal di kampung halaman dan bekerja, sementara sang pemuda meneruskan kuliahnya di LN.....

Mereka melanjutkan hubungan mereka melalui surat dan telepon. Kadang-kadang timbul kesulitan, tapi mereka tidak menyerah terhadap keadaan. Suatu hari, dalam perjalanan ke tempat perhentian bis sepulang dari kerja, si gadis tertabrak mobil hingga tak sadarkan diri. Ketika siuman, dia melihat kedua orangtuanya dan menyadari betapa beruntungnya dia dapat selamat. Melihat air mata orangtuanya, dia berusaha untuk menghibur mereka. Tetapi dia menemukan... bahwa dia tidak dapat berbicara sama sekali. Dia bisu..... Menurut dokter kecelakaan tersebut telah mencederai otaknya, dan itu menyebabkannya bisu seumur hidupnya. Mendengar orangtuanya membujuknya, tapi tidak dapat menjawab sepatah kata pun, gadis tersebut pingsan...

Sepanjang hari hanya dapat menangis dan membisu...Ketika akhirnya dia boleh pulang dari RS, dia mendapati rumahnya masih seperti sedia kala. Hanya jika telepon berdering, dia menjadi pilu. Dering telepon telah menjadi mimpi terburuknya. Dia tidak dapat memberitakan kabar buruk tersebut kepada pacarnya dan menjadi bebannya. Dia menulis sepucuk surat untuknya, memberitahukan bahwa dia tdk mau lagi menunggunya. Hubungan antara mereka sudah putus, bahkan dia mengembalikan cincin pertunangan mereka. Mendapat surat dan telepon dari si pemuda, dia hanya bisa menitikkan air mata... Ayahnya tidak tahan melihat penderitaannya, dan memutuskan untuk pindah. Berharap bahwa dia dapat melupakan segalanya dan menjadi lebih bahagia...

Pindah ke tempat baru, si gadis mulai belajar bahasa isyarat. Dia berusaha melupakan sang pemuda... Suatu hari sahabatnya memberitahukan bahwa pemuda itu telah kembali dan mencarin ya ke mana-mana. Dia meminta sahabatnya untuk tidak memberitahukan dimana dia berada dan menyuruh pemuda tsb. untuk melupakannya.... Lebih dari setahun, tidak terdengar lagi kabar pemuda itu sampai akhirnya sahabat si gadis menyampaikan bahwa sang pemuda akan menikah dan menyerahkan surat undangan. Dia membuka surat undangan itu dengan hati pedih, dan menemukan namanya tercantum dlm undangan. Sebelum dia sempat bertanya kepada sahabatnya, tiba-tiba sang pemuda muncul di hadapannya.Dengan bahasa isyarat yang kaku, ia menyampaikan bahwa.... Aku telah menghabiskan waktu lebih dari setahun untuk mempelajari bahasa isyarat, agar dapat memberitahukan kepadamu bahwa aku belum melupakan janj> i kita, berikan aku kesempatan, biarkan aku menjadi suaramu. "I-L O V E-Y O U" Melihat bahasa isyarat tersebut, dan cincin pertunangannya.... Si gadis akhirnya tersenyum.

Perlakukan setiap cinta seakan cinta terakhirmu... dan baru kamu akan belajar cara memberi.....

Perlakukan setiap hari seakan hari terakhirmu..... dan baru kamu akan belajar cara menghargai......Jangan pernah menyerah.


Ingatlah bahwa kasih yang paling indah dan sukses yang terbesar, mengandung banyak resiko... Yakinlah pada dirimu ketika kamu berkata: "Aku mencintaimu..."

Thanks for the author who's wrote this great story..

Some thoughts, for single who's getting married

A relationship coach lays out his 5 golden rules for evaluating the
prospects of long-term success.

When it comes to making the decision about choosing a life partner, no
one wants to make a mistake. Yet,with a divorce rate of close to 50
percent,it appears that many are making serious mistakes in their
approach to finding Mr/Ms Right!

If you ask most couples who are engaged why they're getting married,
they'll say: "We're in love." I believe this is the #1 mistake people
make when they date.


Choosing a life partner should never be based on love (alone). Though
this may sound not politically correct, there's a profound truth here.
Love(alone) is not the basis for getting married. Rather, love is the
result of a good marriage. When the other ingredients are right, then
the love will come.

Let me say it again: You can't build a lifetime relationship on love
alone. You need a lot more.

Here are five questions you must ask yourself if you're serious about
finding and keeping a life partner.

QUESTION #1:
Do we share a common life purpose?

Why is this so important?
Let me put it this way: If you're married for 20 or 30 years, that's a
long time to live with someone.

What do you plan to do with each other all that time? Travel, eat and
jog together? You need to share something deeper and more meaningful.
You need a common life purpose.

Two things can happen in a marriage. You can grow together, or you can
grow apart.50 percent of the people out there are growing apart.

To make a marriage work, you need to know what you want out of life -
bottom line - and marry someone who wants the same thing.


QUESTION #2:
Do I feel safe expressing my feelings and thoughts with this person?
This question goes to the core of the quality of your relationship.

Feeling safe means you can communicate openly with this person. The
basis of having good communication is trust! i.e. trust that I won't
get "punished" or hurt for expressing my honest thoughts and feelings.

A colleague of mine defines an abusive person as someone with whom you
feel afraid to express your thoughts and feelings.
Be honest with yourself on this one. Make sure you feel emotionally safe
with the person you plan to marry.


QUESTION #3:
Is he/she a mensch?
A mensch is someone who is a refined and sensitive person.

How can you test? Here are some suggestions.
1. Do they work on personal growth on a regular basis?
2. Are they serious about improving themselves?
A teacher of mine defines a good person as "someone who is always
striving to be good and do the right thing".

"So, ask about your significant other: What do they do with their time?
Is this person materialistic?"

Usually, a materialistic person is not someone whose top priority is
character refinement.

There are essentially two types of people in the world: People who are
dedicated to personal growth and people who are dedicated to seeking
comfort. Someone whose goal in life is to be comfortable will put
personal comfort ahead of doing the right thing.

You need to know that before walking down the aisle.


QUESTION #4:
How does he/she treat other people?
The one most important thing that makes any relationship work is the
ability to give. By giving, we mean the ability to give another person
pleasure.


Ask: Is this someone who enjoys giving pleasure to others or are they
wrapped up in themselves and self-absorbed?

To measure this, think about the following:
> 1. How do they treat people whom they do not have to be nice to,
such as waiters, bus boys, taxi drivers, etc?
> 2. How do they treat parents and siblings? Do they have gratitude
and appreciation?>
> 3. Do they show respect?

If they don't have gratitude for the people who have given them
everything, you cannot expect that they'll have gratitude for you - who
can't do nearly as much for them!
4. Do they gossip and speak badly about others?
Someone who gossips cannot be someone who loves others. You can be sure
that someone who treats others poorly, will eventually treat you poorly
as well.


QUESTION #5:
Is there anything I'm hoping to change about this person after we're
married?
Too many people make the mistake of marrying someone with the intention
of trying to "improve" them after they're married.

As a colleague of mine puts it, "You can probably expect someone to
change after marriage ... for the worse!"
If you cannot fully accept this person the way they are now, then you
are not ready to marry them.

In conclusion, dating doesn't have to be difficult and treacherous. The
key is to try leading a little more with your head and less with your
heart.
It pays to be as objective as possible when you are dating, to be sure
to ask questions that will help you get to the key issues.



Falling in love is a great feeling, but when you wake up with a ring on
your finger, you don't want to find yourself in trouble because you
didn't do your homework.


HOW WILL I KNOW IF I'VE MET THE PERSON I SHOULD MARRY?

The choice of a marriage partner should not be based on "I get a warm,
wonderful feeling whenever we're together and I want to have that warm
wonderful feeling forever, so let's go get married".

Feelings, as we have discussed, have no logic on their own. They need
to be acknowledged, of course, but they need considerable assistance
from your brain.



Marriage means choosing the person you will spend the rest of your life
with. This, as you may have guessed, is a very long time to
spend with one person. This person will live with you, eat meals with
you, sleep with you and go on vacation with you. More important yet,this
person will share your children.

You need to choose wisely.



The decision should not be made based on feelings alone. You need to
ask yourself some tough questions. The decisions have to be made on
solid considerations.



Will this person be a good partner? Is she mature enough to put her own
selfish desires aside to look out for what is best for the family?

Is he prepared to be a good provider? What is his track record? Is he
responsible enough to get a good job and keep it?

Will this person be a good parent? Can you stand the thought of your
children turning out exactly like this person? They will, you know,
Children spend a lot of time with their parents and consequently pick
up many or most of their parents' character traits. You had better like
your spouse's traits a lot because you will be seeing them again in
your children.

If something were to happen to you, would you completely trust this
person, alone, with the task of raising and forming your children? This
is not a pleasant thought, but it is an important consideration. Not
everyone dies at a ripe old age with great grandchildren gathered
around the bed.
Sometimes a parent dies and leaves young children in the care of the
other parent. If you feel that you would need to be around to correct
or lessen this person's influence on your children, then you are
considering the wrong person.



Does this person share your faith in God? God does not give us children
so that we can mould them into the coolest, most popular people in school.
Our job is to get them to heaven. To do that, we need to raise them
believing in God. It is tough to do that if only one parent believes.


Saying "This is right and that is wrong, and I want you to ignore Mommy >
until you are thirty-five" does not work. Small children ask about
eight million questions in a single day. The answers to those questions
go a long way toward forming the kind of adults they will become. Who
will be answering those questions for your children?



Does this person you are marrying have sexual self-control? Single
people sometimes have this idea that marriage is just some kind of
lifelong sex festival and that as long as they have each other, they
will never be tempted by other people. Wrong!
There are many times in every marriage when one partner or the other is
sexually unavailable - illness, the last months of pregnancy, travel.

There are also times when spouses, just get on each others' nerves. At
times like this, other people can seem very appealing. That can be
dangerous, because there are plenty of very attractive people out there
who are willing to make themselves available to married men and women.
Do you want someone who has never said "no" to sex? If he is not good
at saying "no" at eighteen, it won't be different at forty. Do you want
to worry about whether or not your Spouse is being faithful?



These are very important questions, and if you are not comfortable with
all of the answers, you should definitely not marry this person.

None if this is to say that feelings play no role at all in a marriage
decision. You don't have to, "Well, I suppose that you would make a
good spouse and parent, so even though I don't particularly like you I
guess I'll marry you'.



You need to be happy and excited about the prospect of spending your
life with someone. Your brain however must acknowledge that this person
as a good choice. Don't listen to your heart alone > nor your
head alone.

Wait until your heart and head agree...

Ku Ingin Kau Tahu

Special for Long Distance Couple...What a great song...

Selama aku pergi
Ku akan mengingatmu
Tak hanya sementara
Selalu dan selalu kurindukan
Senyummu untukku di sini

Reff 1:
Ku ingin kau tahu
Meski pun ku jauh
Ku ada di hatimu
Ku ingin kau tahu
Meski pun kau jauh
Kau tetap milikku
Selamanya

Ku bernyanyi untukmu
Untukmu yang kurindukan
Tetaplah setia menungguku
‘Kan kembali

Reff 2:
Ku ingin kau tahu
Meski pun ku jauh
Kau ada di hatiku
Ku ingin kau tahu
Meski pun kau jauh
Kau tetap milikku
Selamanya


by : – Adrian Martadinata


PS : For someone that very far away from me now..even distance between us, i will always be with you in your heart, anytime u need me just touch your heart then i'll be there...coz you are so special for me..